A spiritual leader asked his pupils if they saw a $20 bill and a $100 bill on the floor which one they’d pick up.

Nobody answers but finally one guy meekly blurts out, “$100.”

The spiritual leader simply says, “I see.”

After a small pause, of his pupil asks him, “Which one would you have picked up, oh Wise One?”

Looking straight into his eyes the leader answers, “I’d have picked up both.”

Dating is like traveling on a bicycle. If you don’t like the journey, you can get off anytime.

Marriage is like traveling by airplane. Once you’re in, you can’t get off that easy.

Jack and his friend walk into a restaurant when they happen to bump into the Jack’s former teacher.

Introducing his teacher, Jack says, “This is Mr. Miller, my high school teacher who always used to correct me and taught me everything I know.”

“Young man,” said Mr. Miller, “you mean I taught you everything you didn’t know, don’t you? I’m not in the habit of teaching students what they already know.”

Mike and John were talking about their coworker, Dan.

Mike: What happened to Dan today? He didn’t show up to work this morning.

John: Oh, Dan’s in the hospital getting treatment for a few broken bones.

Mike: What happened? I saw him dancing with a woman at the bar last night.

John: Yeah, unfortunately so did his wife.