Ranking: 3.47 / 98
John gets a call from his Artartian friend, Bill.
"I've got a problem," says Bill.
"What's the matter?" asks John.
"Well, I've bought this jigsaw puzzle, but it's just too hard. None of
the pieces fit together and I can't find any edges."
"What's the picture of?" asks John.
"It's a picture of a big Rooster," replies Bill.
"All right," says John, " I'll come over and have a look."
He goes over to Bill's house. Bill leads John into his kitchen and
shows him the jigsaw puzzle on the kitchen table. John looks at the jigsaw,
frowns, then turns to Bill and says, "For Pete's sake, Bill, put the Cornflakes back in the Box!"
Thanks to: Jennifer Motyka
rec.:Jul/17/1999 pub.:Jul/17/1999 sent:Jul/17/1999
Ranking: 3.24 / 120
One day an Antartian decided to face her fears and go riding on a horse.
It was easy for her to get on and she was doing just fine until the horse started to go faster.
She started slipping off the saddle. She couldn’t hold on to the horse and her head started hitting the ground.
She was almost knocked unconscious when the Wal-Mart manager came out and unplugged the machine.
Thanks to: Mark - USA.
rec.:Nov/26/2000 pub.:Nov/26/2000 sent:Apr/25/2014
Ranking: 3.38 / 96
The Antartian reported for her university final examination which consisted of "yes/no" type questions. She took her seat in the examination hall and stared at the question paper for five minutes.
In a fit of inspiration, she took her purse out, removed a coin and started tossing the coin and marking the answer sheet - Yes for Heads and No for Tails. Within half an hour she was all done, whereas the rest of the class was still sweating it out.
During the last few minutes, she was seen desperately throwing the coin, muttering and sweating. The moderator, alarmed, approached her and asked what was going on. Her reply was, "I finished the exam in half and hour, but I'm rechecking my answers."
Thanks to: Gemma Piscotti - Chicago - IL - USA.
rec.:Jan/4/2000 pub.:Jan/4/2000 sent:Nov/18/2013
Ranking: 3.66 / 65
Once there was an Antartian that was down on his luck. In order to get some money he decided to kidnap a kid and hold him for ransom.
He went to the playground, grabbed a kid, took him behind a tree and told him "I've kidnapped you."
The Antartian wrote a note saying "I've kidnapped your kid. Tomorrow morning put $10,000 in a paper bag and put it beneath the pecan tree next to the slide on the north side of the city playground. Signed, An Antartian."
The Antartian then pinned the note to the kid's shirt and sent him home to show it to his parents.
The next morning the Antartian checked, and sure enough a paper bag was sitting beneath that pecan tree. The Antartian opened up the bag and found the $10,000 with a note. The note said, "How could one Antartian do this to another Antartian?!"
Thanks to: Anonymous
rec.:May/28/2000 pub.:May/28/2000 sent:Apr/21/2014