Category: Police Jokes



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Ranking: 2.23 / 52
In Australia, a race was proclaimed, with a huge payoff for the winner. The one stipulation was that only ostriches were allowed to run the race. A fellow decided to enter, but not having an ostrich, and hearing that the fastest ostrich in the world was the mascot of the local police department, he stole the bird and entered the race. As luck would have it, when the pistol shot went off to start the race, the ostrich buried its head in the sand and the fellow lost the race.
Moral: Never run afoul of the law!
#17920    
Thanks to: Freddie Pitz - Ottawa - Ontario - Canada
rec.:Apr/17/2007    pub.:Apr/30/2007    sent:Aug/14/2008


Ranking: 2.17 / 47
At the start of the shift one of the police officers asks "Did you hear about the terrible head on collision on route 208 between a Thunderbird and a Mustang? There was horse manure and feathers all over the road!"
The Chief came into headquarters a few minutes later. Not being too fast on the uptake, he was asked the same question, followed by the same "Horse manure and feathers all over the road."
"Anybody hurt?" he asked.
#20007    
Thanks to: Harry Kuhles - Montgomery - TX - USA.
rec.:Mar/31/2009    pub.:Oct/6/2009    sent:Aug/21/2010


Ranking: 1.94 / 67
A traffic cop pulled over a speeding motorist and asked, "Do you have any ID?"
The motorist replied, "About what?"
#2663    
Thanks to: Anonymous - USA.
rec.:Jan/2/2002    pub.:Jan/2/2002


Ranking: 1.67 / 104
Three guys witness a murder; the only problem is they each say only one thing. The first guy says, "Mememememe." The second guy says, "Forks and knifes." And the third guy says, "Goody, goody gumdrops."
When the policeman gets there, he asks, "Who killed this man?" The first guy replies, "Memememememe." Then the policeman asks, "What did you kill him with?" The second guy replies, "Forks and knifes. Forks and knifes." Then the policeman says, "That's it! You're all going to jail." The third guy says, "Goody, goody gumdrops!"
#351    
Thanks to: Jen and Kathy - Cincinnati - Ohio - USA.
rec.:Jun/5/1999    pub.:Jun/5/1999    sent:Jun/5/1999


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