Policeman: What are you looking for, Mister, did you lose something?
Man: Yes, I lost my watch.
Policeman: Where did you lose it?
Man: On Tenth Street.
Policeman: But this is Twelfth Street.
Man: I know. But when I dropped it, it was still running.
Fresh from graduation the rookie policeman called the precinct to report his first robbery: "Chief, a man has been robbed down here and I've got one of them."
Chief: "Great job. Which one of them do you have?"
Rookie: "I have the one that has been robbed."
A police car pulled up in front of grandma Bessie's house, and grandpa got out. The polite policeman explained that the elderly gentleman said that he was lost in the park and couldn't find his way home.
"Morris," said grandma, "you've been going to that park for over 30 years, how come you get lost today?"
Leaning close to grandma, so that the policeman couldn't hear, grandpa whispered, "I wasn't lost. I was just too tired to walk home."