puns jokes

Compact disc manufacturers were worried about music industry plans to phase out CDs and bring back LPs. Defending the threat to their livelihood, the CD manufacturers took their case to court, where the judge listened patiently to a lengthy debate about the relative merits of CDs and LPs.

After weighing up the various arguments, the judge ruled in favor of LPs.

The CD manufacturers were furious. “Do we have no right of appeal?” they demanded.

“I’m afraid not,” said their lawyer. “The judge’s decision is vinyl.”

"Hey Susan, which one of these paddles should I take to the lake?"

"Either oar..."

A man named Benny meets a genie who grants him three wishes. Benny wishes for a fine house, a beautiful wife, and a million dollars.

The genie grants his wishes, but warns him that can never shave his beard, or he will be turned into an urn. Benny enjoys his life for many years, but his lovely wife doesn't like his beard and asks him to shave it off. Though afraid of the genie's prophesy, Benny shaves his beard, and is immediately turned into an urn.

THE MORAL: A BENNY SHAVED IS A BENNY URNED!