Police officer talks to a driver: "Your tail light is broken, your tires must be changed, and your bumper hangs halfway down. That will be 300 dollars!!"
Driver: "Alright, go ahead and do it. They want twice as much as that at the garage."
2 bedbugs were having a discussion. "I just graduated from bedbug private investigator classes. I'm going to start performing clandestine and secret investigations."
"I figured you'd want to be an 'in your face, take no prisoners, out there' kind of police bug?"
"Not really. I do my best work under cover!"