airplane jokes

Category: "Airplane Jokes"
$15.00 won 2 votes

During the ‘rush hour’ at Houston’s Hobby Airport, a flight was delayed due to a mechanical problem.

Since they needed the gate for another flight, the aircraft was backed away from the gate while the maintenance crew worked on it. The passengers were then told the new gate number, which was some distance away.

Everyone moved to the new gate, only to find a third gate had been designated for them. After some further shuffling, everyone got on board, and as they were settling in, the flight attendant made the standard announcement

"We apologize for the inconvenience of this last-minute gate change. This flight is going to Washington, D.C. If your destination is not Washington, D.C., then you should exit the plane at this time."

A very confused-looking and red-faced pilot emerged from the cockpit, carrying his bags. "Sorry," he said, "wrong plane."

2 votes

CATEGORY Airplane Jokes
Joke Won 3rd Place won $15.00
posted by "merk" |
$6.00 won 1 votes

"Kulua Airlines is pleased to announce that we have some of the best flight attendants in the industry...

... Unfortunately none of them are on this flight!"

1 votes

CATEGORY Airplane Jokes
Joke Won 9th Place won $6.00
posted by "Gene R." |
$15.00 won 2 votes

An airliner was having engine trouble, and the pilot instructed the cabin crew to have the passengers take their seats and get prepared for an emergency landing.

A few minutes later, the pilot asked the flight attendants if everyone was buckled in and ready.

"All set back here, Captain," came the reply, "except one lawyer who is still going around passing out business cards."

2 votes

CATEGORY Airplane Jokes
Joke Won 3rd Place won $15.00
posted by "merk" |
1 votes

This guy is at the airport waiting for his flight which leaves at 6:00 but he has forgotten his watch, so he looks for someone to ask the time. He spots this guy walking past carrying two suitcases and sporting this fabulous hi-tech watch, so he asks him for the time. The guy replies, "Sure. Which country?"

Our fella asks, "How many countries have you got?" to which the reply is "All the countries in the world!"

"Wow! That's a pretty cool watch you've got there."

"That's nothing. This watch also has a GPS facility, fax, e-mail and can even receive NTSC television channels and display them on its miniature active color pixel LCD screen!"

"Boy, that's incredible. I wish I had a watch like that one... You wouldn't consider selling it by any chance?"

"Well, actually the novelty has worn off by now, so for $900, if you want it, it's yours!"

Our watch-less traveler can hardly whip out his check book fast enough, and hands over a check for $900.

The seller takes off the watch and gives it to him. "Congratulations, here is you new hi-tech watch!" and then handing the two suitcases over as well he says, "and here are the batteries!"

1 votes

CATEGORY Airplane Jokes
posted by "wadejagz" |