bar & drinking jokes

Category: "Bar & Drinking Jokes"
5 votes

A girl walked into a bar and said to the barman, "Bud light please."

He said, "Are you 18?"

She said, "No."

He said, "I can't serve you then."

As I walked out I thought to myself, "This is the fourth bar i have been in today. What does a 22 year old have to do to get a beer around here?"

5 votes

posted by "Egbert" |
$12.00 won 7 votes

To increase his tips the local bartender posted the following:

PHONE NOTIFICATION FEES (ADD $1.00 TO INSERT NAME)

$1.00 HE NOT HERE!
$2.00 ON HIS WAY OUT!
$3.00 HE JUST LEFT!
$4.00 HAVEN'T SEEN HIM ALL DAY!
$5.00 WHO?

PAY BARTENDER UPON ARRIVAL AT BAR.

7 votes

Joke Won 4th Place won $12.00
posted by "Egbert" |
2 votes

A man went to the doctor with a mystery ailment.

The doctor asked: "Do you drink to excess?"

The man replied: "I’ll drink to anything."

2 votes

posted by "D-Gellybean" |
$25.00 won 11 votes

A man was staggering home drunk in the early hours of the morning when he was stopped by a police officer.

“What are you doing out at this time of night?” asked the officer.

“I’m going to a lecture,” said the drunk.

“And who’s going to be giving a lecture at this hour?”

“My wife.”

11 votes

Joke Won 2nd Place won $25.00
posted by "D-Gellybean" |