bar & drinking jokes

Category: "Bar & Drinking Jokes"
2 votes

A pirate walks into a bar with a paper towel on his head, sits down and orders a drink.

Bartender serves the pirate his drink, and asks about the paper towel.

The pirate smiles and says, "That be the bounty on me head!"

2 votes
posted by "Jonathan Wendt" |
1 votes

An ant walks into a bar with his good friend Mister No, who is not an ant. The bartender says, "I'm sorry. We only serve ants here."

The ant says, "But this is my good friend Mister No."

The bartender says, "Sorry, but I don't take No for an ant, sir."

1 votes
posted by "Sonny Meyers" |
0 votes

As a nightclub owner, I hired a pianist and a drummer to entertain my customers. After several performances, I discovered the drummer had walked away with some of my valuables. I notified the police, who arrested him.

Desperate for another drummer, I called a friend who knew some musicians. "What happened to the drummer you had"? he asked me.

"I had him arrested," I replied.

My friend paused for a second and asked, "How badly did he play"?

0 votes
posted by "HENNE" |
$6.00 won 9 votes

Text message from husband to his wife:

A very nice Highway Patrol officer asked me if I was drinking.

I jokingly replied, "That depends, are you buying?"

Tough crowd. Please send bail money.

9 votes
Joke Won 9th Place won $6.00
posted by "Eufaulasrguy" |