bar & drinking jokes

Category: "Bar & Drinking Jokes"
$50.00 won 8 votes

THINGS THAT IS DIFFICULT TO SAY WHEN DRUNK:
1. Innovative
2. Preliminary
3. Proliferation
4. Cinnamon

 THINGS THAT ARE VERY DIFFICULT TO SAY WHEN DRUNK:
1. Specificity
2. British Constitution
3. Passive- aggressive disorder  

THINGS THAT ARE DOWNRIGHT IMPOSSIBLE TO SAY WHEN DRUNK:
1. Nope, no more beer for me.
2. Good evening, officer. Isn't it lovely out tonight?
3. Oh, I couldn't. No one wants to hear me sing.

8 votes

Joke Won 1st Place won $50.00
posted by "Benjones" |
$50.00 won 6 votes

A girl walked into a bar and said to the barman, "Bud light please."

He said, "Are you 18?"

She said, "No."

He said, "I can't serve you then."

As I walked out I thought to myself, "This is the fourth bar i have been in today. What does a 22 year old have to do to get a beer around here?"

6 votes

Joke Won 1st Place won $50.00
posted by "Egbert" |
$12.00 won 6 votes

To increase his tips the local bartender posted the following:

PHONE NOTIFICATION FEES (ADD $1.00 TO INSERT NAME)

$1.00 HE NOT HERE!
$2.00 ON HIS WAY OUT!
$3.00 HE JUST LEFT!
$4.00 HAVEN'T SEEN HIM ALL DAY!
$5.00 WHO?

PAY BARTENDER UPON ARRIVAL AT BAR.

6 votes

Joke Won 4th Place won $12.00
posted by "Egbert" |
1 votes

A man went to the doctor with a mystery ailment.

The doctor asked: "Do you drink to excess?"

The man replied: "I’ll drink to anything."

1 votes

posted by "D-Gellybean" |