The seven-year old told her mom that a little boy in her class asked her to play doctor.

"Oh,dear," the mother nervously sighed. "What happened, honey?"

"Nothing, he made me wait 45 minutes and then double-billed the insurance company."

Mrs. Goldberg was shopping at a produce stand in her neighborhood. She approached the vendor and asked, "How much are these oranges?"

"Two for a dollar," answered the vendor.

"How much is just one?" she asked.

"Sixty cents," answered the vendor.

"Then I'll take the other one," said Mrs. Goldberg.

"Danny," began Mrs. Waters, "what's usually used as a conductor of electricity?"

"Why- er..."

"Correct, wire. Now tell me, what is the unit of electrical power?"

"The what???"

That's absolutely right. The watt."

A newspaper reporter was writing a feature story about prison life and was interviewing one of the prisoners. "Do you watch much television here?"

"Only the daytime shows," the inmate said. "At night we're locked in our cells and don't see any television."

"That's too bad," the reporter said. "But I do think it's nice that the warden lets you watch it in the daytime."

"What do you mean, nice?" the inmate said. "That's part of the punishment."