salespeople jokes

Customer: "I’m looking for something cheap but high quality."

Salesperson: "You’re in luck! This pen writes just like a $100 pen."

Customer: "How much is it?"

Salesperson: "$99.99."

Salesperson: "This is your lucky day! We have a special offer: Buy one, get one free!"

Customer: "No thanks. I don't need two."

Salesperson: "Then give the free one to a friend!"

Customer: "I don't have any friends."

Salesperson: "Then make one with the free item!"

Here are the reasons I'd like to thank Wal-Mart, K-Mart, Target, and my local grocer for having 25 checkout lanes and only three open at any given time.

- I can run next door and pick up my dry cleaning.

- I can catch up on my magazine reading without buying any.

- I can catch a quick catnap now rather than on the drive home.

- I can finally apply my top coat of nail polish with plenty of drying time.

- I can practice my standup comedy routines on unsuspecting fellow customers.

- I can assess what other people have in their carts and get exciting new dinner ideas.

- I have time to leave my cart in line and run back to get the 13 things on my list I forgot.