Little Susie: "What do ya want for Christmas this year, Tommy?"
Little Tommy: "A calendar."
Little Susie (surprised): "A calendar, why's that?"
Little Tommy: "'Cause last week I pretended to be sick so I could stay home from school, and then I found out it was Saturday."
A Sunday School teacher began her lesson with a question. "Boys and girls, what do we know about God?"
A hand shot up in the air. "He is an artist!" said the kindergarten boy.
"Really?! How do you know?" the teacher asked.
"You know - 'Our Father, who does art in Heaven..."
Little Billy: "Mommy got mad at me today."
Little Susie: "Really? Why?"
Little Billy: "This morning she said, 'I wish I had some new clothes. If people came to visit, they'd think I was the cook.' An' I said, 'They wouldn't think that for long if they stayed for dinner.'"