kid jokes

A father and his son were looking at a nativity scene in a London gallery. It was Titian's world-famous painting of the scene at Bethlehem. The boy said, “Dad, why is the baby lying in such a crude cradle in a pile of straw?”

"Well, son,” explained the father, “they were poor, and they couldn't afford anything better.”

Said the boy, "Then how could they afford to have their picture painted by such an expensive artist?”

A few years ago we were desperately trying to sell our house, which was situated on a busy thoroughfare. Our real estate agent decided to have an open-house nearly every day to promote the sale. We instructed the children not to talk to anyone about the house.

One evening a man took our seven-year-old daughter aside and asked if our house had any secrets he should know. Her first reaction was to smile and ignore his question. But he became more persistent and, finally, she confessed there was one secret but she could not tell it to him.

"Now we're getting somewhere," he said. "Tell me the secret. I promise I won't tell anyone."

She looked him straight in the eye before whispering, "We have monsters in our sewer."

A mother had been dragging her five year old son around the huge grocery store. After nearly 2 hours the little boy exclaimed, "I gotta rest mom, I'm really tired!"

"Only a couple more things," she replied.

Pointing his finger towards a doorway Timmy shouted, "Look Mom, we could go over there! It says 'Rest Room'!"

How are coffee beans like kids?

They're always getting grounded.