Tom to his mom: "Mom, please tell me a story?"
Mom: "Sorry, honey, I don't have any new stories to tell. But you should ask your dad why he was late coming home today. He will then tell you some amazing stories."
Dad was angry when he saw that his son scored a zero in math.
"Son, can you explain this to me?"
"Well dad, the teacher didn't have any stars left to give me, so she gave me a moon!"
What did the dim candle say to the new and bright CFL in the classroom?
"Watt's up dude!"
One morning when I was seven, my Mom was lecturing me about an untruth I told her.
In response I said, "Honest Mom, I didn't know I was lying. I thought I was just making it up."