food jokes

While shopping at the supermarket, I did not know where to find some items on my grocery list.

I spotted a store employee and politely asked, “Excuse me, young man, can you tell me where the nuts are?"

The employee answered, “Well, sir, they might be just about anywhere.“

*You've worn out the handle on your favorite coffee mug

*You go to AA meetings just for the free coffee

*You've worn the finish off you coffee table

*Instant coffee takes too long

*You name your cats "Cream" and "Sugar"

*The Taster's Choice couple wants to adopt you

*Starbuck's owns the mortgage on your house

*You're so wired you pick up FM radio

*Your life's goal is to "amount to a hill of beans"

*Your lips are permanently stuck in the sipping position

*Your first-aid kit contains two pints of coffee with an I.V. hookup

*You want to be cremated just so you can spend eternity in a coffee can

When I met my now wife, I asked if she was vegetarian because she really loved animals.

She responded, "No, I just really hate vegetables."

Last week I was bored, so I decided to swap around the labels on my wife's spice rack.

So far, she hasn't noticed.

Mark my words though, the thyme is cumin.