merk Profile

Image
 

merk

User Details

Member Since : Nov, 2015
# of jokes posted : 1071
# of followers : 3
# of following: 0
eligible jokes to win : 7
Location: United States
won: $ 1022.00
1 votes

If you really want to get better at golf, go back and take it up at a much earlier age.

Since bad shots come in groups of three, a fourth bad shot is actually the beginning of the next group of three.

No matter how bad you are playing, it is always possible to play worse.

When your shot has to carry over a water hazard, you can either hit one more club or two more balls.

A golf match is a test of your skill against your opponents luck.

Every time a golfer makes a birdie, he must subsequently make two triple bogeys to restore the fundamental equilibrium of the universe.

You can put "draw" on the ball, you can put "fade" on the ball, but no golfer can put "straight" on the ball.

Don't buy a putter until you've had a chance to throw it.

1 votes

CATEGORY Golf Jokes
posted by "merk" |
2 votes

At long last the good-humored boss was compelled to call Fisk into his office.

"It has not escaped my attention," he pointed out, "that every time there's a home game at the stadium you have to take your aunt to the doctor."

"You know you're right, sir," exclaimed Fisk. "I didn't realize it... you don't suppose she's faking it, do you?"

2 votes

CATEGORY Sport Jokes
posted by "merk" |
1 votes

Mom and Dad were trying to console Susie, whose dog, Skipper, had recently died.

"You know," Mom said, "it's not so bad. Skipper's probably up in Heaven right now, having a grand old time with God."

Susie stopped crying and asked, "What would God want with a dead dog?"

1 votes

CATEGORY Family Jokes
posted by "merk" |
1 votes

After a lengthy conference with the estranged husband, the lawyer reported to his client.

"Mrs. LaMay, I have succeeded in making a settlement with your husband that is eminently fair to both of you."

"Fair to both?!?" exploded Mrs. LaMay. "I could have done that myself! What's the point of hiring a lawyer for then?"

1 votes

CATEGORY Lawyer Jokes
posted by "merk" |