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“Nice dog. What’s its name?” I asked my friend’s 10-year-old son. “Bob,” he said. “And your cat?” “Bob.” “How do you keep them straight?” “Well one is Bob Cat and...
My significant other and I were discussing mistakes we have made in our relationship. I suggested she should embrace her mistakes. She then hugged me.
One morning my wife asked our four-year-old son, Jud, what he wanted for breakfast. ”Soup,” he said. “Son, we don’t eat soup for breakfast. We eat soup for lunch. So what w...
As I was admitted the hospital for a procedure, the clerk asked for my wrist, saying, "I'm going to give you a bracelet." "Has it got rubies and diamonds?" I ask coyly. "No,"...
My second grade announced at the dinner table that after school a boy in her class had kissed her. Trying to stay cool her mother asked, "How did that happen?" Our daughter s...
Three seniors are out for a stroll. One of them remarks, “It’s windy.” Another replies, “No way. It’s Thursday.” The last one says, “Me too. Let’s have a soda.”
A wife comes downstairs before a dinner date with her husband. "Do I look fat in this dress?" the wife asks. "Do I look dumb in this shirt?" the husband replies.
Sitting behind a couple of nuns at a baseball game (with their habits partially blocking the view), three men decided to badger the nuns in an effort to get them to move. In a v...
I had a question for my English as a second language teacher... Me: This word confuses me, can you give me a sentence using 'apparently'? Teacher: Apparently, you don’t...
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