Geography teacher asked if I could name a country with no 'R' in it.
I said, "No way!"
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If a Lama with one L is a holy man in Tibet... And a Llama with two L's is an adorable beast of burden... What's a three L Lama? A big fire in Boston.
We were driving in my friend Larry's new car. I asked him about its features. He listed the usual, then added: "It tells me to slow down as I approach the speed limit. It warns...
How does an attorney sleep? First he lies on one side, then he lies on the other.
Jareth the Goblin King
A famous model is going on a vacation in Africa. She takes her little bag dog Foofie along with her because she never went anywhere without her. As the model goes off exploring, Fo...
Nothing looks good on me anymore,” wailed a customer modeling an outfit in front of the department store’s mirror. “Nonsense, ma’am,” soothed the salesclerk. “That dress says it...
The air traffic controller, working a busy pattern, told the 727 on downwind to make a three-sixty (usually done to provide spacing between aircraft). The pilot of the 727 comp...
I tried to re-marry my ex-wife… But she figured out I was only after my money!
I read recipes the same way I read science fiction... I read to the end and say, "Well, that's not going to happen."
A man sees a job advert published on a building site, "Handy man wanted; apply within." The man goes to speak to the foreman and applies. Foreman: "Can you drive a forklift truc...
Teacher: Vincent, not to be presumptuous, but your short story is truly fantastic. Did you really write it? Vincent: Yes, I wrote, while my mother dictated.
My art instructor complimented my painting of a ring-shaped reef island... They said, “Not bad, not bad atoll.”
Jareth the Goblin King
There was a Roman emperor who never aged after he turned 19... His name was Constant-Teen.
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