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My ex-girlfriend just told me she wants us to get back together again. MAN, I sure am LUCKY! I mean, first I win the lottery and now THIS!!!
"I'm ashamed of you," the mother said. "Fighting with your best friend is a terrible thing to do!" "He threw a rock at me!" the boy said. "So I threw one at him." The mothe...
A magician was working on a Caribbean cruise ship. The audience was different each week, so the magician allowed himself to do the same tricks over and over again. There was onl...
The racehorse owner was annoyed with the running of his horse at the race. He turned on the jockey. "Flaherty, could you not have raced faster?" "Sure I could have, but you k...
I went a wise man the other day for advice and he said, "He who knows and knows he knows, knows not. He who knows not and knows he knows not, knows." I don't know who's going t...
Went to see a psychic who was in a bad mood... ...then I saw a clairvoyant who was really grumpy. I'm just trying to find a happy medium
A new pastor was visiting in the homes of his parishioners. At one house it seemed obvious that someone was at home, but no answer came to his repeated knocks at the door. Therefor...
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