The Best Clean Jokes Since 1995

Joke Of The Day

A pirate walks into a bar with a paper towel on his head, sits down and orders a drink.

Bartender serves the pirate his drink, and asks about th... read more...

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AJOKEADAY has given away $9,528 in cash prizes to date.

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Placed 1st Earned $50

It's For The Do...

1
20 votes

When our client’s dog lapped up anti-freeze, the veterinarian I work for ordered a unique treatment... an IV drip mixing fluids with vodka. “Go buy the cheapest bottle you can find...

Category Animal Jokes
1st place won $50
posted 4 days ago

Mary

2 jokes eligible to win
Lifetime JokePrize Winnings $284
  • 19 Jokes
  • 2 Followed By
  • 0 Following
Placed 2nd Earned $25

The Anxious Poo...

0
19 votes

Poodle: “My life is a mess. My owner is mean, my girlfriend is leaving me for a German shepherd, and I’m as nervous as a cat.” Collie: “Why don’t you go see a psychiatrist?”...

Category Animal Jokes
2nd place won $25
posted 4 days ago

stee

1 jokes eligible to win
Lifetime JokePrize Winnings $499
  • 24 Jokes
  • 1 Followed By
  • 0 Following
Placed 3rd Earned $15

The Camper's Se...

2
16 votes

Two campers are hiking in the woods when one is bitten on the rear end by a rattlesnake. “I’ll go into town for a doctor,” the other says. He runs ten miles to a small town and fin...

Category Doctor Jokes
3rd place won $15
posted 5 days ago

Mounika

0 jokes eligible to win
Lifetime JokePrize Winnings $603
  • 19 Jokes
  • 4 Followed By
  • 0 Following
Placed 4th Earned $12

Check Please!

0
15 votes

My friend has a bad habit of overdrawing her bank account. One day before we went shopping, I complained about my lack of funds and lamented, “Guess I’ll use plastic.” Uncon...

Category Money Jokes
4th place won $12
posted 11 days ago

sravanthi

0 jokes eligible to win
Lifetime JokePrize Winnings $706
  • 25 Jokes
  • 1 Followed By
  • 0 Following
Placed 5th Earned $10

This Lawyer Is...

1
14 votes

The attorney tells the accused, “I have some good news and some bad news.” “What’s the bad news?” asks the accused. “The bad news is, your blood 
is all over the crime scene,...

Category Lawyer Jokes
5th place won $10
posted 11 days ago

srg

1 jokes eligible to win
Lifetime JokePrize Winnings $34
  • 4 Jokes
  • 0 Followed By
  • 0 Following
Placed 6th Earned $9

My Wonderful Se...

1
14 votes

Two young soldiers were exchanging their experiences of the service in the Army. "My sergeants are wonderful", said one soldier. "I wish I could say the same about mine," sa...

6th place won $9
posted 11 days ago

mickey

2 jokes eligible to win
Lifetime JokePrize Winnings $1300
  • 49 Jokes
  • 26 Followed By
  • 0 Following
See All Winners

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$50
2nd Place
$25
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$15
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$12
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$10
6th Place
$9
7th Place
$8
8th Place
$7
9th Place
$6
10th Place
$5

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