Classmates at college were lamenting the cost of long distance phone service and debating the relative advantages of AT&T, MCI, and Sprint.
"I've found CTC to be the cheapest plan around," offered one.
"CTC? Who are they?"
"You know," he responded. "Call Them Collect."
My son Mark was only 5 feet, 8 inches tall when he left for college in the fall. He worked through the Christmas holidays and didn't return home again until the February break.
When he got off the plane, I was stunned at how much taller he looked. Measuring him at home, I discovered he now stood at 5 feet, 11 inches. My son was as surprised as I. "Couldn't you tell by your clothes that you'd grown?" I asked him.
"Since I've been doing my own laundry," he replied, "I just figured everything had shrunk."
The boys were arriving back at the fraternity house after the summer vacation.
"What have you been doing this summer?" one asks another.
"Working in my dad's office, and you?"
"Yeah, I've been loafing around and doing nothing too."
A professor reproved his students for coming late to class. "This is a class in English composition," he remarked with sarcasm, "not an afternoon tea."
At the next meeting, one girl was twenty minutes late. The professor waited until she had taken her seat. Then he remarked bitingly, "How will you have your tea Miss Jones?"
"Without the lemon, please," Miss Jones answered quite gently.