A college physics professor was explaining a particularly complicated concept to his class when a pre-med student interrupted him. “Why do we have to learn this stuff?” one young man blurted out.
“To save lives,” the professor responded.
A few minutes later the student spoke up again. “So how does physics save lives?”
The professor stared at the student for a long time without saying a word. Finally, the professor continued, “Physics saves lives because it keeps certain people out of medical school.”
Professor: "Why do pimples make horrible prisoners?"
Student: "Because they keep breaking out!"
It had been snowing for hours when an announcement came over the University's intercom: "Will the students who are parked on University Drive please move their cars so that we may begin plowing."
Twenty minutes later there was another announcement: "Will the twelve hundred students who went to move 26 cars please return to class."
While away from home in college I wrote a letter to my dad.
It said: "No mun, no fun, your loving son."
He wrote back saying: "Too bad, so sad, your loving dad."