A man walks up to a librarian and asks, "Do you have any books on Pavlov's dogs and Schrödinger's cat?"
The librarian responds, "It rings a bell but I'm not sure if it's here or not."
The Dean is hospitalized after a heart attack.
As he is lying in his hospital bed reflecting on his near brush with death, an attendant arrives with a lovely bouquet of flowers.
The Dean asks the attendant to hand him the card and finds that it reads, "By a vote of 26 to 3 with 2 abstentions, the faculty wish you a speedy recovery."
Q: What did Paul Revere say at the end of his ride?
A: “Whooaa, horsey, whooaa!”
What is the least spoken language in the world?