political jokes

My dog sleeps about 20 hours a day.
He has his food prepared for him. He can eat whenever he wants.
His meals are provided at no cost to him.

He visits the Dr. once a year for his checkup, and again during the year if any medical needs arise.
For this he pays nothing and nothing is required of him.
He lives in a nice neighborhood in a house that is much larger than he needs and he is not required to do any upkeep.
If he makes a mess, someone else cleans it up.

He has his choice of luxurious places to sleep.
He receives these accommodations absolutely free.
He is living like a King, and has absolutely no expenses whatsoever.

All of his costs are picked up by others who go out and earn a living every day.
I was just thinking about all this, and suddenly it hit me like a brick ... I think my dog is a member of Congress!

A (coming of age) talk with his grandson the evening before his graduation from high school.

Paul Revere: I’ll never forget a certain midnight ride. We were on the verge of impending war with the British. The smell of fear and uncertainty lingered in the night air.

Grandson: Grandpa...

Paul Revere: Yes?

Grandson: Who are the British?