word play jokes

Why can’t you put two half-dollars in your pocket?

Because two halves make a hole, and your money will fall out!

The owner of the tuxedo store kept hovering over me when i was browsing, so I asked him to leave me alone.

He said, “Fine, suit yourself.”

Alcohol and calculus don't mix...

Don't drink and derive!

I went to the zoo.

There was only ONE exhibit in the entire zoo.

It was a Shih Tzu.