Latest Jokes

The minister drove into a sand trap. He picked up his golf club, broke it but didn't say a word.

Then he picked up the golf bag and tore it to shreds but didn't say a word.

He then took out all the golf balls and flung them into the woods but did not say one word.

Finally he muttered, "I'm gonna have to give it up."

"Golf?" asked the caddie.

"No," he replied, "the ministry."

My two-year old granddaughter, Sally was with her mother while her older sister was being examined by the dentist.

Sally kept herself busy playing with toys in the waiting room until she noticed that her mom was resting, her eyes closed.

With about six other patients waiting, Sally marched up to her mother, looked her straight in the face and shook her shoulder. "Mommy," she yelled, "Wake up! This is not church!"

Bill: I know a man who drove a stagecoach and it didn’t have any wheels.

Ted: What held it up?

Bill: Bandits.

Here are the top 10 signs you may be an Internet Geek...

10. When filling out your driver's license application you give your IP address.

9. You no longer ask prospective dates what their sign is, instead your line is "Hi, what's your URL?"

8. Instead of calling you to dinner, your spouse sends e-mail.

7. You're amazed to find out spam is a food.

6. You "ping" people to see if they're awake, "finger" and "AYT" them to make sure they're listening to you.

5. You search the Net endlessly hoping to win every silly free T-shirt contest.

4. You introduce your wife as "my lady@home.wife" and refer to your children as "client applications".

3. At social functions you introduce your husband as "my domain server".

2. After winning the office super bowl pool you blurt out, "I feel so "colon-right parentheses!"

And the number one sign you are an Internet Geek:

1. Two Words: "Pizza's Here!"