Tomaso Profile



User Details

Member Since : Nov, 2015
# of jokes posted : 20
# of followers : 3
# of following: 0
eligible jokes to win : 0
Location: United States
won: $ 19.00
0 votes

Q: What do you get when you mix vodka, orange juice, and milk of magnesia?

A: A Philips Screwdriver.

0 votes

posted by "Tomaso" |
$6.00 won 2 votes

Q; What are the first 3 words the Giant said to Jack?
A: Fee-Fye-Fo

Q: What are the first 4 words the Giant said to Jack?
A: Fee-Fye-Fo-Fum

Q: What are the answers to both questions, combined?
A: Fee-Fye-Fo-Fee-Fye-Fo-Fum

Q: What do you have?
A: Mike Tyson's telephone number

2 votes

Joke Won 9th Place won $6.00
posted by "Tomaso" |
1 votes

On New Year's Eve, Patty stood up in the local bar and said that it was time to get ready. At the stroke of midnight, she wanted everyone to be standing next to the one person who made their life worth living.

As the clock struck 12, chaos erupted as the bartender was almost crushed to death.

1 votes

posted by "Tomaso" |
0 votes

You Know You Had Too Much Coffee When
• Juan Valdez names his donkey after you
• You get a speeding ticket even when you're parked
• You grind your coffee beans in your mouth
• You sleep with your eyes open
• You have to watch videos in fast-forward
• You lick your coffee pot clean
• Your eyes stay open when you sneeze
• The nurse needs a scientific calculator to take your pulse
• You can type sixty words a minute with your feet
• You can jump-start your car without cables
• Your only sources of nutrition comes from "Sweet & Low"
• You don't sweat, you percolate

0 votes

posted by "Tomaso" |