A group of extraterrestrials were sent to earth to monitor and/or stop the use of nuclear weapons. The first creature they made contact with was a chimpanzee. Mistakenly they mistook the chimp as being the dominant species of planet earth.
After scanning the chimp one of them looked at the others and said, “This must be a mistake, perhaps we’re on the wrong planet.”
One of the other Aliens said, “You may be right. It’s obvious these beings are far too intelligent to use nuclear power in a destructive way."
A scientist finally realizes his dream of creating a formula for becoming invisible. Entering the family home, he trips over a mysterious unseeable lump. The mystery quickly unraveled after finding a note left by his less scientific sibling written as follows:
Dear Brother,
Hope you don’t mind. I’ve borrowed your formula to do some tests of my own. First, I will run through walls! Second...
What's E.T. short for?
So he can fit in the spaceship.
Why are ghosts banned from the liquor stores?
Because they would steal all the BOOS!