A man found a defenseless baby squirrel in the woods. He placed the tiny creature inside his shirt to carry it out.
When asked about his act of kindness he said, "No way I could leave this little critter in distress. However, I have a word to the wise, make sure you tighten your belt a notch or two before you toss one in your shirt."
In a European town the streets were cleared for an annual race.
The second place driver said the winner cheated by using one of those round intersections with several exits as a shortcut.
In the end the judges decided the winner did no wrong.
After all, turnabout is fair play.
Billy: Though my Aunt is very dear to me the truth is, no one likes her homemade pudding except you Johnny. Tell me why you always get a double helping and also take the leftovers home?
Johnny: I use it to patch the cracks in my driveway; it lasts for years.