marriage jokes

Category: "Marriage Jokes"
0 votes

When my teenage son worked part time in a hardware store, a man came in to buy hooks for hanging plants. But there were only two hooks left in the gold color that he needed.

My son, trying to be helpful, suggested, "Could you maybe use the silver or the white instead? "
The customer scrutinized him and said, "You're not married, are you?"

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CATEGORY Marriage Jokes
posted by "Raac" |
0 votes

Anyone who says marriage is an equal partnership is talking utter bollocks.

I gave up my mates, my motorbike, drinking, drugs, gambling...

All she gave up was sex.

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CATEGORY Marriage Jokes
posted by "aod318" |
2 votes

While I was working in the men's section of a department store, a woman asked me to help her choose a white dress shirt for her husband.

When I asked about his size, the woman looked stumped at first, then her face brightened. She held up her hands, forming a circle with her forefingers and thumbs.

"I don't know his size," she said, "but my hands fit PERFECTLY around his neck."

2 votes

CATEGORY Marriage Jokes
posted by "merk" |
$15.00 won 2 votes

Dear Customer Service,

Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 and noticed a slowdown in the performance of the flower and jewelry applications that had operated flawlessly under the Boyfriend 5.0 system.

In addition, Husband 1.0 uninstalled many other valuable programs, such as Romance 9.9, and installed undesirable programs such as NFL 7.4, NBA 3.2 and NHL 4.1.

Conversation 8.0 also no longer runs, and Housecleaning 2.6 simply crashes the system.

I've tried running Nagging 5.3 to fix these problems, but to no avail.

What can I do?

Signed,

Desperate

2 votes

CATEGORY Marriage Jokes
Joke Won 3rd Place won $15.00
posted by "merk" |