marriage jokes

Category: "Marriage Jokes"
$7.00 won 5 votes

When do you congratulate someone for their mistake?

On their Wedding Day!

5 votes

CATEGORY Marriage Jokes
Joke Won 8th Place won $7.00
posted by "Victoria" |
2 votes

My husband and I divorced over religious differences.

He thought he was God and I didn't.

2 votes

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posted by "Harry Finkelstein" |
0 votes

The divorce proceedings had been long, contentious and extremely heated. Finally, the husband's attorney rose for one last try at a no-alimony divorce.

"Your Honor," he said, "my client sincerely believes his wife is just being ridiculous. Why, most women would love to have a husband who still believes in chivalry, and on the day in question, he was only opening the door for her out of chivalry."

"Counselor," replied the judge, "I am granting the divorce and the settlement Mrs. Smith is asking in its entirely. I simply cannot believe chivalry was the motivation for your client opening that car door - while he was driving down the freeway at 65 mph."

0 votes

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posted by "Merkv814" |
$15.00 won 6 votes

No offense, but I was raised to “take care of my husband”...

Wash his clothes, clean the house, wear gloves, get rid of the body, act really sad at the funeral.

6 votes

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Joke Won 3rd Place won $15.00
posted by "Chloe2015" |