A Texas rancher visited an old Irish Farmer. The old Irishman was very proud of his farm, since it was passed down for many generations. He took the Texan outside and told him his farm boundary went from the tall tree, over to the road, down to the end of the white fence, back behind the barn to the oak post and then back to the tree.
The Texan said at his farm in Texas, he could drive East in his truck all day and not reach the end of his property, South the next day all day and not reach the end of his property, West the next day all day and not reach the end of his property and North the next day all day and not reach the end of his property.
The Irishman thought about the Texan’s description about his ranch and said, “I had a truck like that one time.”
An accountant is in a car traveling with a farmer client around his farm. They pass a large group of sheep and the farmer says, "You're pretty good with numbers, Keith. How many sheep do you reckon are in that paddock?"
The accountant looks at the sheep for a moment and says, "One thousand, eight hundred and thirty two."
The farmer is amazed. "Exactly right," he says. "How did you work that out so fast?"
"Easy," says the accountant, "I counted the number of feet and divided by four."