Farmers Brown & Jones had adjoining farms for years and didn't get along at all.
One night after supper, Farmer Brown knocked on Farmer Jones's door. When Farmer Jones answered the door, Farmer Brown said, "I know we don't talk often, but I wanted you to know that our mule just died today."
Farmer Jones replied, "I'm certainly sorry to hear that, but I am wondering why you came over here to tell me?"
"Because," Farmer Brown said, "you're always supposed to notify the next of kin."
A farmer lived on a quiet, rural highway. As time went by, the traffic slowly built up at an alarming rate. It became so heavy and so fast that his chickens were being run over at a rate of three to six chickens a day. A call to the sheriff resulted in signs being put up near the farmer's land that said "Slow: School Crossing." Chickens were still being run over. The sheriff had the signs changed to say "Slow: Children at Play." Again no change.
"Look, your signs are just not working. Mind if I put up one of my own?" asked the farmer. The Sheriff agreed. Three weeks later, the Sheriff decided to see if the new sign was working because he had not received anymore complaints. Upon close inspection, the sheriff saw the new sign that was making a difference. Written on a whole sheet of plywood were the words... "Slow: Nudist Colony."