A farmer in Rhode Island just grew the largest pumpkin in North America, weighing over 2,200 pounds.
The only downside, the man’s wife no longer thinks it’s cute when he calls her “pumpkin.”
Interviewer: "Congratulations on winning the lottery."
Farmer: "Thank you."
Interviewer: "Do you have any special plans for spending all of that money?"
Farmer: "Nope. Not really. I'm just gonna keep farming until the lottery money is all gone."
A little girl was watching her daddy repair his tractor.
She asked her mother, "What happens to old tractors when they finally stop working?"
Sighing, her mother answered: "Someone sells them to your father, dear."
A retiring farmer needed to rid his farm of animals in preparation for
selling his land. So he went to every house in his town.
To the houses where the man is the boss, he gave a horse. To the houses
where the woman is the boss, a chicken was given.
He got toward the end of the street and saw a couple outside gardening.
"Who's the boss around here?" he asked.
"I am." said the man.
"I have a black horse and a brown horse," the farmer said, "which one
would you like?"
The man thought for a minute and said, "The black one."
"No, no, no, get the brown one." the man's wife said.
"Here's your chicken." said the farmer.