doctor jokes

Category: "Doctor Jokes"
4 votes

My doctor was giving me a hard time about my health. To get back on his good side I bought a puppy and named him 'Five Miles'.

That way, when I went to see my doctor I could tell him, "I walk five miles every morning!"

4 votes

CATEGORY Doctor Jokes
posted by "danmug" |
1 votes

How is an optometrist like a good teacher?

They both make pupils grow!

1 votes

CATEGORY Doctor Jokes
posted by "Glenn Diamant" |
3 votes

A woman walks into her psychiatrist's office and says, "Hey doc, you know how we have been talking about saying things that don't come out the way we meant them to?"

The psychiatrist replies, "You mean Freudian slips?"

"Exactly, those. Well, I had the most amazing one last night. I was eating dinner with my husband, and I meant to say, 'Honey, could you please pass the salt,' but instead I said, 'You damn fool, you ruined my life.'"

3 votes

CATEGORY Doctor Jokes
posted by "HENNE" |
$9.00 won 5 votes
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A woman had some problems, so she went to her doctor of twenty years. They had the following conversation:

Doctor: "Take the red pill after breakfast with one glass of water."

Woman: "Okay."

Doctor: "Take the blue pill after lunch with two glasses of water."

Woman: "Okay."

Doctor: "Take the yellow pill after dinner with three glasses of water."

After giving these instructions to the woman, she asks, "Can you tell me what's wrong with me, doctor?"

Doctor: "Yeah. You don't drink enough water."

5 votes

CATEGORY Doctor Jokes
Joke Won 6th Place won $9.00
posted by "HENNE" |