Master: That shirt looks soiled, didn't you wash it?
Servant: I did! But while i was taking it to the shop for ironing i dropped it on the ground!
Master: You will have to wash it again!
Servant: Again, Sir?
Master: I'm a stickler for cleanliness. So anything that falls on the ground has to be washed with soap and water.
Servant: I'll remember that.
The next morning...
Servant: Sir, here is your newspaper.
Master: Yes! But why is it soaking wet, You idiot?
Servant: While i was bringing it to you i dropped it on the ground.... But I remembered your instructions and washed it thoroughly with soap and water.
How many paranoids does it take to change a lightbulb?
Who wants to know?!?!
How many mystery writers does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
Two - one to screw it most of the way and the other to give it a surprise twist at the end.
How many kids with ADD does it take to change a lightbulb?
Let's go ride bikes!