A baseball manager who had an ulcer went to see his doctor for a checkup.
"Remember," the doctor said, "don't get excited, don't get mad, and forget about baseball when you're off the field."
Then he added, "By the way, how come you let the pitcher bat yesterday with the tying run on second and two men out in the ninth?"
Great news, Mr. Bradley," the psychiatrist reported. "After eighteen months of therapy, I can pronounce you finally and completely cured of your kleptomania. You'll never be trapped by the desire to steal again."
"Gee, that's great, Doc," the patient replied.
"And just to prove it, I want you to stop by the mall on the way home and walk the length of the stores. You'll see that you'll feel no temptation to shoplift whatsoever."
"Oh, Doctor, what can I do to thank you?"
"Well," suggested the psychiatrist, "if you DO have a relapse, I could use a new TV."