doctor jokes

Category: "Doctor Jokes"
$50.00 won 13 votes

Patient: Doctor, you must help me. I'm under such a lot of stress, I keep losing my temper with people.

Doctor: Tell me about your problem.

Patient: I JUST DID, DIDN'T I, YOU STUPID BRAINLESS DEAF FOOL!!! MAYBE IF YOU LISTENED, YOU WOULD BE ABLE TO HELP SOME!

13 votes

CATEGORY Doctor Jokes
Joke Won 1st Place won $50.00
posted by "mickey" |
12 votes

A man was walking down the street one day when he was brutally beaten and robbed. As he lay unconscious and bleeding, a psychologist, who happened to be passing by, rushed up to him and exclaimed, "My God! Whoever did this really needs help!"

12 votes

CATEGORY Doctor Jokes
posted by "mickey" |
$25.00 won 12 votes

Patient: Doctor, doctor, I keep thinking I'm a dog.

Doctor: Lie down on the couch and I'll examine you.

Patient: I can't, I'm not allowed on the furniture.

12 votes

CATEGORY Doctor Jokes
Joke Won 2nd Place won $25.00
posted by "mickey" |
1 votes

A woman with a minor injury was at the hospital because her doctor said she wanted to take a closer look at it to make sure everything was all right. The woman's husband sits patiently in the waiting room.
After a few minutes, the doctor comes out and asks her assistant for a wrench, which understandably concerns the husband.

Then, after a couple more moments, the doctor re-enters the room, this time asking for a screwdriver. The husband grows worried and begins to pace in circles. Then, a little later, the doctor bursts through the doors screaming for a hammer and at that, the husband, in a state of frenzied fear, runs up and asks, "Doctor, what the heck is wrong with my wife?"

"I don't know," replies the flustered doctor, "I can't get my bag open!"

1 votes

CATEGORY Doctor Jokes
posted by "HENNE" |