At school, Little Johnny’s teacher is explaining the meaning of the word instinct to the class.
Little Johnny isn’t paying attention, so the teacher asks him what does instinct mean.
Little Johnny says, “It’s when the person in front of you farts.”
Did you know that camel cigarettes are mentioned in the Bible?
Genesis 24:64 (KJV)
And Rebekah lifted up her eyes, and when she saw Isaac, she lighted off the camel.
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Honda cars are also in the Bible! They’re so quiet, they’re good for praying in.
Acts 1:14 (KJV)
These all continued with one accord in prayer and supplication, with the women, and Mary the mother of Jesus, and with his brethren.
First Assistant: "So what dimensions do the doors, hinges, walls, and locks need to be so that everything fits?"
Person who invented the first public bathroom stall: "Ah, don't worry about that. Can't stress enough how unimportant that part is."
I went to the zoo.
There was only ONE exhibit in the entire zoo.
It was a Shih Tzu.