Latest Jokes

Diner: "These oysters are very small."

Waiter: "I suppose, sir."

Diner: "And they don't look very fresh."

Waiter: "Then I suppose it's a good thing they're so small, isn't it, sir?"

After 35, women don’t have one night stands.

We have auditions.

I tried to get into a trendy New York nightclub last night.

The doorman said to me, "Sorry sir, you've had too many."

Confused, I replied, "What, drinks?"

"No, sir, birthdays!"

Our 26-year-old son moved back home with the idea to stock away money to buy a condo. We never bothered asking how long he'd planned to stay, but I got a pretty good idea when I walked into his room recently.

In the corner was a milk jug with a few coins in it and a label that read: "Condo Down Payment"