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Little Johnny: “Having a farm is really hard work.”
Billy: “It’s an ant farm Johnny, all you have to do is supervise.”
A teenage foreign exchange student knew the metric system as well as European colloquialism and slang but he wasn’t well versed with imperial measurement or the use of North American English.
When the exchange student wanted to know what a foot is, the boy that helped him only added to his confusion by saying. “I can give you a hand with that.”
Norma and Sonia were talking about their grandchildren after the holidays. Norma said, "My daughter-in-law stopped making my grandchildren send their 'thank you' notes. Each year I sent the grandchildren a card with a generous check inside. I always received a lovely `thank you' note. However, since my daughter-in-law stopped making the grandkids send thank you notes, I never hear from them."
Sonia said, "My daughter-in-law never made the grandchildren send `thank you' notes. I too send them a very generous check. However, for the past several years, I hear from them within a week after they receive it. In fact, they each pay me a personal visit."
"Wow," remarked Norma. "I wish mine would do that."
"You can, Norma, you can."
"How?" Norma asked
"Simple. Do what I do. Don't sign the check."
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