Latest Jokes

1 votes

From my auto mechanic:

"That part is much less expensive than I thought."
"I've never seen anyone maintain their car as well as you do."
"You could get that done more cheaply at the garage down the street."
"It was just a loose wire. No charge."

From my son's preschool teacher:

"Everyone misbehaved today except Michael."
"Michael traded his candy bar for carrot sticks."
"I wish we had 20 Michaels."

1 votes

CATEGORY Misc Jokes
posted by "merk" |
1 votes

I called my mother from the apartment. When she answered the phone, I could hear a noise behind her that sounded like a jet plane taking off. I asked, "Mother, what's that horrible noise?"

She replied, "It's the dishwasher.... your father fixed it."

1 votes

CATEGORY Marriage Jokes
posted by "aod318" |
$15.00 won 5 votes

I went to the doctor the other day and complained about my sore feet.

He said: “Gout!”

I said: “But I’ve only just walked in!”

5 votes

CATEGORY Doctor Jokes
posted by "Danny Jackson" |
1 votes

My kindergarten-aged daughter suddenly announced just before school that she needed to take a clean tee shirt to class. She told us the teacher was going to iron an anti-drug message on it.

My wife frantically swept through my daughter's room, finding nothing usable but one tee shirt that already had something printed on one side. She sent it off to school with my daughter.

That afternoon, my daughter returned and happily showed off her shirt.

On one side it said, "Families are Forever."

And on the other, "Be Smart, Don't Start."

1 votes

CATEGORY Kid Jokes
posted by "merk" |