My wife has evil lessons with Satan every week...
I don’t know how much she charges.
What do you get when you eat a rabbit?
You get a hare in your mouth.
I was walking past a farm and a sign said 'Duck, eggs!'
I thought, "That's an unnecessary comma..."
And then it hit me.
It's ten below zero one early spring day in Alaska. Pat is drinking at his local saloon and the bartender says to him, "You owe me quite a bit on your tab."
"Sorry," says Pat, "I'm flat broke this week."
"That's okay," says the bartender. "I'll just write your name and the amount you owe me right here on the wall."
"But," says Pat, "I don't want any of my friends to see that."
"They won't," says the bartender. "I'll just hang your parka over it until it's paid."