A woman visits her husband in prison. Before leaving, she tells a corrections officer, "You shouldn't make my husband work like that. He's exhausted!"
The officer laughs, saying, "Are you kidding? He just eats and sleeps and stays in his cell!"
"That's not true!" she shouts. "He just told me he is been digging a tunnel for months!"
A boy asks his parents for a new computer because his old one is running too slow. His parents tell him it’s not in the budget.
Determined, the boy goes into the kitchen, grabs the microwave and food processor, comes back and begins attaching the two appliances together. His parents see the boy and ask him what he’s doing.
He says, “First I’m building the microprocessor and then I’ll see what else we got lying around.”