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Favorite this joke ATTORNEY: Doctor, how many of your autopsies have you performed on dead people?
WITNESS: All of them. The live ones put up too much of a fight.
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Man: I'm new around here. Will you please direct me to the bank?
Little boy: I will, but only if you pay me ten dollars.
Man: Why should I pay you so much?
Little boy: Because bank directors are always highly paid.
9th Place
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A hunter visited another hunter and was given a tour of his home. In the den was a stuffed lion.
The visiting hunter asked, ''When did you bag him?''
The host said, ''That was three years ago, when I went hunting with my wife.''
''What's he stuffed with?'' asked the visiting hunter.
“My wife!”
All day I drill holes in metal and bolt them together...
At first it's boring, but then it's riveting.
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