Latest Jokes

4 votes

Two women were shopping. When they started to discuss their home lives, one said, "Seems like all my boyfriend and I do anymore is fight. I've been so upset I've lost 20 pounds in two weeks."

"Why don't you just leave him then?" asked her friend.

"Not yet," the first replied, "I like to lose at least another 10 to 15 pounds first."

4 votes

CATEGORY Misc Jokes
posted by "HENNE" |
1 votes

I told my boss that three companies were after me and I need a raise.

My boss asked, "What companies?"

I replied, "Gas, water, and electricity."

1 votes

CATEGORY Work Jokes
posted by "Harry Finkelstein" |
$8.00 won 3 votes

A man answers the phone and has the following conversation:

"Yes, mother, I've had a hard day. Colleen has been very difficult - I know I ought to be more firm, but it is hard. Well, you know how she is. Yes, I know you warned me. I remember you told me that she was evil and would make my life miserable and you begged me not to marry her. I should have listened to you. You want to speak with her? All right."

He looks up from the phone and calls to his wife in the next room, "Colleen, your mother wants to talk to you!"

3 votes

CATEGORY Marriage Jokes
Joke Won 7th Place won $8.00
posted by "HENNE" |
2 votes

The priest said to the poor farmer, "If you had a horse, would you give it to the Lord?"

"Yes."

"And if you had a cow?"

"Absolutely."

"And a goat?"

"Sure."

"A pig?"

"Now, that's not fair!" protested the farmer. "You know I have a pig!"

2 votes

posted by "wadejagz" |