Why couldn’t the astronaut book a room on the moon?
It was full.
What’s the difference between love and marriage?
Love is one long, sweet dream and marriage is the alarm clock.
Father: Little Johnny, I see by your report card that you are not doing well in history. How come?
Little Johnny: I can’t help it. The teacher always asks me about things that happened before I was born.
Cop: I’m arresting you for illegally downloading the entire Wikipedia.
Man: Wait! I can explain everything.