The wife told her husband, "Let's go antique shopping today. I'm feeling Victorian."
"No," he said, "let's not... I'm feeling baroque!"
Father: The man who marries my daughter gets a prize.
Suitor: Can I see the prize first?
My wife asked if she could have a little peace and quiet while she cooked dinner.
So I took the battery out of the smoke detector.
Aviator: First one wing came off and then the other.
Listener: What did you do?
Aviator: I grabbed a drumstick and had a second helping.