There was a guy that bet his friend he could name every single ingredient in a hotdog. Seeing as how he was drunk, his friend decides to take him on.
After some inaudible talk and a few loud outbursts, he inevitably lost. Needless to say, the ingredients he named weren't even in the BallPark.
Teacher: "Name the nation that people dislike the most?"
Little Johnny: "That's easy, it's the 'Exami-nation'!"
During the first day of Navy Boot Camp, the lieutenant in charge had a stack of cards with each person’s name on it. He said, “When I read off your name, I want you to step forward, say 'Here, sir', then salute me, and then get back to where you were!”
Lieutenant: “Andrews!”
Andrews: “Here, sir!”
Lieutenant: “Cooper!”
Cooper: “Here, sir!”
Lieutenant: “Seeback!” (No response) “Seeback! (Still no response) “I said Seeback!”
The admiral next to him whispers something in his ear. The lieutenant then turns the card over and says: “Lodge!”
Lodge: “Here, sir!”