A detective came up and asked me where I was between 6 and 7...
He seemed annoyed when I said, “second grade."
The topic of the day at Army Airborne School was what you should do if your parachute malfunctions. We had just gotten to the part about reserve parachutes when another student raised his hand.
"If the main parachute malfunctions," he asked, "how long do we have to deploy the reserve?"
Looking the trooper square in the face, the instructor replied, "The rest of your life."
"What is your definition of 'Normal'?"
"It's nothing but a setting on your dryer."
Do not meddle in the affairs of dragons...
For you are crunchy and taste good with ketchup.