Latest Jokes
Favorite this joke I've started a new exercise program.
I do twenty sit-ups every morning.
That may not sound like a lot, but you can only hit that SNOOZE button just so many times...
In a Catholic school cafeteria, a nun places a note in front of a pile of apples, "Only take one. God is watching."
Further down the line is a pile of cookies.
A little boy makes his own note, "Take all you want. God is watching the apples."
PRENATAL: when your life was still somewhat your own.
PUDDLE: a small body of water that draws other small bodies wearing dry shoes into it.
SHOW OFF: a child who is more talented than yours.
STERILIZE: what you do to your first baby’s pacifier by boiling it and to your last baby’s pacifier by blowing on it.
TOP BUNK: where you should never put a child wearing Superman jammies.
GRANDPARENTS: the people who think your children are wonderful even though they are sure you are not raising them right.
HEARSAY: what toddlers do when anyone mutters a dirty word.
IMPREGNABLE: a women whose memory of labor is still vivid.
INDEPENDENT: how we want our children to be as long as they do everything we say.
OW: the first word spoken by children with older siblings.
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