Latest Jokes

$50.00 won 10 votes

Drill Sergeant (speaking to new recruit having difficulty): "What was your occupation before enlisting in the army?"

Recruit: "Traveling salesman, sir."

Drill Sergeant: "Stick around, you'll get plenty of orders around here!"

10 votes

CATEGORY Military Jokes
Joke Won 1st Place won $50.00
posted by "maryjones" |
$10.00 won 8 votes
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Can you please stop asking Santa for the perfect woman???

I almost got kidnapped 3 times today!!!

8 votes

CATEGORY Holiday Jokes
Joke Won 5th Place won $10.00
posted by "Chloe2015" |
$7.00 won 4 votes

This is a story of self-control and marksmanship by a brave, cool-headed woman with a small pistol against a fierce predator. Here's her story in her own words:

"While walking along the edge of a pond just outside my house in the Villages discussing a property settlement with my soon-to-be ex-husband, and other divorce issues, we were surprised by a huge 12-ft alligator which suddenly emerged from the murky water. It began charging us with its large jaws wide open. She must have been protecting her nest because she was extremely aggressive.

If I had not had my little Ruger .22 caliber pistol with me, I would not be here today! Just one shot to my estranged husband's knee cap was all it took. The gator got him easily, and I was able to escape by just walking away at a brisk pace.

The amount I saved in lawyer's fees was really incredible and his life insurance was also a big bonus!"

4 votes

CATEGORY Marriage Jokes
Joke Won 8th Place won $7.00
posted by "S.Sovetts" |
$12.00 won 8 votes

Before crowbars were invented...

...most crows drank at home by themselves.

8 votes

CATEGORY Puns
Joke Won 4th Place won $12.00
posted by "Danny Jackson" |