Latest Jokes

$5.00 won 5 votes

Teacher: "How much is half of 8?"

Little Johnny: "Up and down or across?"

Teacher: "What do you mean?"

Little Johnny: "Well, up and down makes a 3 or across the middle leaves a 0!"

5 votes

CATEGORY School Jokes
Joke Won 10th Place won $5.00
posted by "S.Sovetts" |
5 votes

Me: "I just burned 2000 calories in 20 minutes."

Friend: "How?"

Me: "I forgot to take my brownies out of the oven."

5 votes

posted by "S.Sovetts" |
4 votes

Two guys went to a local pancake house that served real Vermont maple syrup but charged extra for it.

So the guys went to a supermarket, bought their own Vermont maple syrup, and brought it to the pancake house.

They didn't want to get caught, so they were forced to pass the bottle between them... syrupticiously.

4 votes

posted by "wadejagz" |
$12.00 won 3 votes

A gnome is in the garden busily destroying some bushes when a house cat appears.

"What are you?" asks the cat.

"A gnome," comes the reply. "I steal food from humans, I kill their plants, I make annoying music at night to drive them crazy, and I love mischief. And what, may I ask, are you?"

The cat replies, "Um, I guess I'm a gnome."

3 votes

CATEGORY Animal Jokes
Joke Won 4th Place won $12.00
posted by "HENNE" |