Three Engineering students at a prestigious university were sharing a can of "one-calorie" diet cola. After pouring it equally into three cups one of them drank his. Then the second drank hers.
The third Engineer just stared at the cup suspiciously. "I wonder who got the calorie?"
During tryouts for one of the chorus positions in the upcoming musical The Sound of Music, one of the girls told the judges, "Mother says I sing beautifully."
The judge replied, "Bring me a recommendation from your neighbors and I'll give you a tryout."