Latest Jokes

$10.00 won 7 votes

My wife said last night: "You treat our marriage like it's some sort of game."

Unfortunately, this cost her 12 points and a bonus chance.

7 votes

CATEGORY Marriage Jokes
Joke Won 5th Place won $10.00
posted by "Ryan Faidley" |
$12.00 won 6 votes
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What should you do if you are addicted to seaweed?

Sea-kelp!

6 votes

CATEGORY Puns
Joke Won 4th Place won $12.00
posted by "Ryan Faidley" |
$9.00 won 6 votes

A vain lion wanted to find out why the other animals were not as beautiful as he.

First, he asked a giraffe. The giraffe did not know. Next, the lion asked a bear. The bear had no answer. Then the lion asked a hippopotamus, and again got no answer.

Finally, the lion met a mouse. He asked the mouse, ”Tell me, why aren't you as big, as strong, and as beautiful as I am?”

The mouse looked up at the lion and said, ”Well, I've been sick.”

6 votes

CATEGORY Animal Jokes
Joke Won 6th Place won $9.00
posted by "D-Gellybean" |
$9.00 won 6 votes

A man went to his doctor complaining about terrible neck pains, throbbing headaches and dizzy spells. The doctor examined him and said, “I’m afraid I have some bad news for you. You have only six months to live.”

The doomed man decided he would spend his remaining time on earth enjoying himself. He told his boss what he thought of him and quit his job. Then he took all his money out of the bank and bought a sports coat, 10 new suits, and 15 pairs of new shoes.

Then he went to get himself a dozen tailored shirts. He went to the finest shirt shop he could find. The tailor measured and wrote down 16 neck.

“Wait a moment,” the man interrupted. “I always wear a size 14 neck, and that’s what I want.”

“I’ll be glad to do it for you, sir,” the tailor replied. However, if you wear a size 14 neck your going to get terrible neck pains, throbbing headaches and dizzy spells.”

6 votes

CATEGORY Doctor Jokes
Joke Won 6th Place won $9.00
posted by "D-Gellybean" |