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Favorite this joke I took my cat’s meds by accident...
Don’t ask meow.
4th Place
won
$12.00
After doing laundry, I was putting my clean socks in the top dresser drawer when suddenly the bottom drawer sprang open and smacked me in the shins.
I bent over to close the bottom drawer and the top drawer sprang open and clipped me on the forehead. No sooner did I stand up and close the top drawer when the bottom drawer sprang open again and smacked my chins again.
So, I learned an important lesson in life: When one drawer closes, another drawer opens!
5th Place
won
$10.00
One of our projects at military leadership school called for us to speak in front of the class on a topic picked by our instructor.
A classmate gave an impassioned speech on the benefits of drinking liquor. Alcohol, he insisted, warded off colds, kept you alert, and even made you steadier on your feet.
"Good job," said our instructor when he finished. "Only one thing: Your topic was the benefits of drinking liquids, not liquor."
Saying the same thing over and over again but expecting different results is called parenting.
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