A man told his wife that when he died, he wished to be buried with all his money. He died and was buried. The wife was asked if she indeed buried the husband with all the money.
She said she had done exactly what the husband had requested her to do. She said, “My husband had two million dollars when he died. If you dug up his body today, you would find his bones and a check for two million dollars!"
As a young married couple, a husband and a wife lived in a cheap housing complex near the military base where he was working.
Their chief complaint was that the walls were paper-thin and that they had no privacy. This was painfully obvious when one morning the husband was upstairs and the wife was downstairs on the telephone.
She was interrupted by the doorbell and went to greet her neighbor.
"Give this to your husband," he said, thrusting a roll of toilet paper into her hands. "He's been yelling for it for 15 minutes!"
There was a pretty Nurse named Carol who broke her engagement to a doctor. She was explaining everything to a friend.
"Do you mean to say," exclaimed Cindy, "that the bum asked you to give back the ring AND all his presents?"
"Not only that," said Carol, "he sent me a bill for 37 visits!"