In Ancient Rome there were 4 types of poison.
Poison I, II and III would all kill you.
However Poison IV, would make you really itchy.
The defendant stood up in the dock and said to the judge, "I don't recognize this court!"
"Any why not?" asked the Judge, sternly.
"Because you've had it decorated since the last time I was here."
I visited a haunted house today and my friends fled in terror.
I've been to this place for the last 271 years and haven't seen a single ghost.
Yesterday I went to a temporary tattoo parlor to get a tattoo.
After it wouldn’t wash off this morning I went back to complain, but the tattoo parlor wasn’t there.